It was louder than the New Year’s concert

Spoilers: there is sex in this text. But since it’s text and not porn, I recommend not scrolling to the end, or you’ll… Oh, what am I saying, do what you want. You can also read the text from bottom to top. Or from right to left. You can also sing it to each other.

Before we start, some updates: The dwarf is blooming. He already speaks a little Mandarin and his tap dance class will start soon. (He can’t do anything, really nothing, but everyone’s going crazy.)

Emma’s wish was granted. Sina had a run on New Year’s Eve. (No? Oh come on, I liked him.) She met a man at the party she was at. She wrote me on January 3rd. On January 6, she wrote that she could not see me at the moment. And on January 10 she sent a message that she wanted to focus on him now, that she felt good and that she couldn’t see me anymore. I thought about writing that she said this before but ended up sending some thumbs up emojis.

For anyone who wanted a romantic update on my ex (and maybe some good sex stories*), she spontaneously decided to go to Paris. “If I’m ever in Europe.” But she will do “a round in Zurich” one more time before she leaves. You then register. I haven’t heard anything yet. Somehow I think she doesn’t want to see me. That would be okay too.

Laura came to Hanna’s New Year’s party – around 4 o’clock. She had about fifty girlfriends in tow. Her greeting was serious: “I finally found you! I’ve been looking for you all night! When are we going on a date?” As soon as she said that, she pulled away one of her friends who saw alcohol in the kitchen. Laura went to the kitchen and was never seen again. Well, I wasn’t looking for her either, because okay, now begins the story that ends with sex.

I was just at Hanna’s party. It was as it always is at such parties: At first everyone just stands there, men with beer cans in their hands, women with Prosecco in IKEA glasses. An hour later the whole pack is in the kitchen. Now all with cardboard cups and way too strong gin and tonics without ice cubes. Sometimes I wonder how old do you have to be to change this. But now good.

90 percent of the women were taken and stood arm in arm with their “sweetheart”. I’ve already had a few, so not a good idea either. For some reason it didn’t go any further. Hanna has declared a number of women taboo. You can talk about it, but you should always consider whether it’s worth it. And no one really stays, except someone like Laura, who isn’t really available either.

Around three o’clock, when the first people had already left, a friend of Hanna’s came with a woman I had never seen before. The two women greeted each other, came up to me at the end, and Hanna’s friend placed her visit in front of me and said, “And that’s Ben!” I have no idea what she said about me to introduce myself that way, but I didn’t care either. In any case, it did me no harm. The woman, from Graubünden, teacher, second secondary school in Chur, about the same age, brown hair, short, stopped in front of me and didn’t leave until I left too. At five o’clock. To me.

I think it’s good for women to be loud during sex. However, she was very loud. Was it close to my ears, definitely too loud. But if we weren’t neck and neck, I wouldn’t care. I had the flat to myself anyway and the neighbors were on vacation.

We woke up, I made coffee, we continued. At noon she forced me to put the New Year’s concert on her laptop. “It’s a tradition in our family! If I don’t watch it, bad luck will come!” Hopefully, the deciding factor in their happiness is that the concert goes ahead, not that people are watching. Her gaze was rarely directed to the screen. Acoustically, however, she completely went along with it.

as long as

am