“I’m stuck in a toxic friendship – how do I get out?”

dear community

I’m clearly trapped in a toxic friendship. And I don’t know how to get out. I’ve known my best friend, let’s call her Sandy, since kindergarten. We grew up together, smoked weed together for the first time, practiced kissing together, drank and vomited etc. etc. – the whole teenage program. Now we are both in our mid-twenties and I notice how our relationship changes as we get older. She won’t give me anything. She’s mean to me in front of other people and always tries to make me look bad so people think she’s cooler. She almost always says I look tired when we see each other. Whenever I deal with her, she makes me wait at least 15 minutes without notice. I no longer keep to the agreed time. When asked about it she downplays it all, it’s just jokes, not pretending, we’re BFFs forever and ever!

But I don’t think you can afford everything because you’ve known each other for a long time. I don’t feel comfortable in her presence anymore and I’m always a little scared when we meet other people, what else she really tells about me. But the problem is, since we’ve always traveled together as a couple, we have exactly the same circle of friends. I can’t go anywhere without seeing her. I don’t know how to cut my tightrope without causing major drama and a shit show.

I tried calling in less and that didn’t work at all because then I’ll see her sooner or later and it’s just worse than usual.

What should I do?

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