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Along with attachment theory, a psychology classic is back in vogue. The approach divides people into four types and states that different attachment styles can be the cause of a failed relationship. On the Tiktok video platform, posts with the hashtag #AttachementStyles – in English: types of attachments – are sometimes viewed several million times.
Psychologist and couples therapist Oskar Holzberg (70) from Germany was not surprised that the theory was particularly popular with young adults. “Relationships are complex, and types of attachment create so-called orientation with their clearly defined patterns,” he says.
The parent-child relationship is very formative
Attachment theory dates back to British psychiatrist John Bowlby (1907-1990) and American-Canadian psychologist Mary Ainsworth (1913-1999). In the 1970s, they both explored the relationship between young children and their caregivers. They found that the parent-child relationship shapes our relationships in adulthood.
As a result, a child who has a stable and trusting relationship with their parents can continue to form strong and stable bonds into adulthood. “A child whose needs are not perceived correctly or whose parents do not offer a trusting relationship tends to avoid deeper attachments in adulthood,” says Holzberg. According to experts, if parents do not impose responsibilities on their children, children become dependent on them and then begin to fear losing. They tend to be anxious in relationships.
According to the theory, there are four types of bonds:
- trustworthy
People with a secure attachment style find it easy to trust their partners. You can build intimacy and intimacy while still remaining independent. They have high self-confidence and communicate their needs clearly. According to studies, the secure attachment type is the most represented at around 60 percent. - shy
People with the avoidant attachment type are prepared to experience rejection in the first place. They avoid forming a more intense bond to avoid disappointment and tend to be unable to express their feelings. This type of attachment occurs in 10 to 15 percent of people. - terrible
Relationships of anxious attachment types, which make up about 15 percent, are characterized by fear of loss and insecurity. Such people need too much intimacy and are afraid that their partner does not love them enough. They have a hard time being alone and hold on to their partner to make them feel safe. - irregular
At 5 percent, this type of attachment is the least common. People with disorganized attachment styles tend to behave in unpredictable ways. You want intimacy but at the same time push your partner away. Studies often point to mental illness or traumatic experiences such as childhood violence or abuse as the cause.
«Old experiences can be overwritten»
Some psychologists have criticized the rigid patterns of attachment theory. Holzberg too. “People move on an attachment spectrum and don’t have exactly one attachment style.” We all have our cowardly and timid sides. “Some are more obvious, some less,” he says.
The type of attachment can also change for the better over the years, according to experts. “Once someone with an anxious attachment style gains trust in their relationship, old childhood experiences can be overwritten.”
Source : Blick
I am Dawid Malan, a news reporter for 24 Instant News. I specialize in celebrity and entertainment news, writing stories that capture the attention of readers from all walks of life. My work has been featured in some of the world’s leading publications and I am passionate about delivering quality content to my readers.
