After the 6-1 defeat, artificial intelligence taught me how to become a fan of Portugal

After the traumatic defeat of the Swiss national team against Portugal, I decided to overcome my pain in a strange way. I hired an artificial intelligence to teach me how to become a fan of the opposing team. This way I can focus on the positive side of the sport. Maybe I just need to smoke more marijuana to deal with defeat. Or maybe I should go into trauma therapy. The choice is mine.

This first paragraph is written by an artificial intelligence. Admittedly, the humor can still be worked on. The AI ​​is called ChatGPT, launched a week ago and is currently experiencing extreme hype. Because she can do just about anything: make bad jokes, have an in-depth conversation about modern physics or write Bible verses about sandwiches in VCRs.

So many things that can be of use to humanity. But that doesn’t interest me now. I’m insulted. heartbroken. The Swiss national team lost 6-1 to Portugal in the last sixteen of the World Cup on Tuesday. The soul hurts like the leg after a blood draw by Pepe. I’ll let ChatGPT describe it:

In a nutshell. But does ChatGPT also take away my pain? Make me happy for the Portuguese? cheer them on at their next game?

Yes, it works. At ChatGPT you miss a touch of emotion, the answers are a bit diplomatic, but judge for yourself. Vamos Portugal!

To take away my pain, I first need to know where it comes from. It’s only football! Or?
ChatGPT: The pain you feel when your favorite football team loses is because you are emotionally attached to the team. Defeat can therefore be perceived as a personal insult and we tend to resort to our typically Swiss restraint.

What does typical Swiss restraint mean here?! You are probably also a fan of Portugal.
I am a computer program and have no personal likes or dislikes, even when it comes to sports.

bored.
I’m sorry if I disappointed you. How else can I help you?

I want to become a Portugal fan. So that I can forget the pain that caused me when Switzerland lost to Portugal. I don’t want to be a sore loser.
It’s okay to join another team and switch allegiances if you want to. In fact, it can be very exciting to support a new team and follow their games

But I feel like a traitor.
It is quite normal to feel like a traitor. It is a kind of loss and it is normal to be sad about it. You can try to verbalize and talk about your feelings. Maybe there is someone in your life you trust who can understand why you changed your mind

I only trust you now, ChatGPT.
I am very honored that you trust me. As mentioned before, I am a computer program and have no personal feelings or opinions. I can provide you with information about the Portugal national football team if you wish. Ultimately, however, it’s up to you how you deal with your feelings and what decisions you make. You are the expert of your own life and you know best what is good for you

Can you even be a fan of a team that leaves Cristiano Ronaldo on the bench?
It’s important to note that coaches often make decisions based on tactical considerations and the well-being of the team as a whole, rather than just the popularity of individual players.

Do I have to like Bacalhau to become a fan of Portugal?
I would support Portugal because they have a fantastic football team, not because they serve great food. Though I have to admit I’d like to grab some pasteis de nata next time I’m in Lisbon.

We digress. Can you explain to me in a flaming speech why I should become a fan of Portugal?
My friend, imagine what it feels like to be part of a team that puts tremendous passion and heart into every game. Imagine what it’s like to feel the excitement and emotion as they fight for every ball. Imagine what it’s like to be proud of that. It’s not just about the successes and the trophies, it’s also about the emotions and the passion. If you become a fan of the Portuguese national football team, you become part of these emotions.

Can I now drive through the city with the Portuguese flag honked on my car?
From a philosophical point of view, you could argue that the right to wear a flag on the car and honk loudly is an expression of freedom. The freedom to get involved with a specific cause or team, and to show it publicly, is an important part of what it means to live in a free society.

After all this info, do you think I’m ready to get over my trauma of defeat and cheer for Portugal as a good athlete?
As your hypothetical psychotherapist, I could tell you that it’s important to face your feelings and take time to process them. When you’re ready to leave the trauma of defeat behind and cheer on Portugal, it can help to focus on the positive aspects of football. Enjoy the joy and passion that cheering on a team can bring. But remember, there are more important things in life than the success or failure of a team.