Suddenly, his girlfriend comes to him – Meyer advises: “Your ex acted cowardly”

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Sentences that begin with “Why don’t you just do it” and describe ideal behavior describe just that: ideal behavior. Not real. Of course, her ex-partner would have been morally obligated to end the relationship in a less violent way. But it is clear that for this woman it was not so easy. She probably expected such an unpleasant course of conversation that she preferred to avoid it altogether.

This fear is not completely groundless: the phrase “I don’t want to be with you anymore” usually causes not calm acceptance, but pain, anger, protest, and above all a lot of questions. This is understandable when people look for ways to minimize its impact. Especially if they are fundamentally bad at dealing with confrontation and uncertainty.

Your ex’s behavior was cowardly and mean. But it also shows how she is connected. Apparently a lot went wrong in their development. No one showed her how to talk about feelings and deal with uncomfortable situations. Presumably she was shown how to avoid and remain silent in exactly the way that you now had to endure. This means that she showed you not the worst, but the best.

Which brings us to the question: what can you do to avoid repeating this experience? To the question “How do you deal with conflicts and difficult experiences?” would be a good subject for the next first date. Both are an essential part of a relationship. Just by answering this question, you will understand where you are. Adults have an adult answer to this question. And you must stay away from others.

Source: Blick