China. Angry citizens made in China. The freedom virus is more contagious than the coronavirus.
UNITED STATES. Joe Biden reaches out where no one else is, forgets in the middle of a speech, uh… and gets lost in his backyard.
Leslie Nielsen (The Naked Gun, 1988) had a better grip on text and glasses.
Everything has gone. Except for Jeffrey Epstein’s guest list.
Hell laptop. Mark Zuckerberg admits the FBI forced him to remove negative posts about Joe Biden’s son. So it wasn’t a conspiracy theory after all.
Twitter. Elon Musk says his critics are not afraid of more hate tweets, but more tweets they hate themselves. The Twitter Files agree with him, Twitter was the “daughter” of the FBI.
Switzerland. The anti-women but seasonal feminist co-chair of the SP doesn’t like men. Except yourself.
Minister of Health Berset: “The certificate says that you are not contagious.” Can you show that you are not pregnant with a receipt?
“Guns save lives,” the slogan of the US gun lobby, is now the slogan of former military adversaries.
Germany. The American Dream: Rags to Riches. The German dream: from the dishwasher to the person doing the dishes.
Angela Merkel left, her specialists remained. 2,500 young North Africans storm the Italian seaside resort of Peschiera del Garda and chant “This is Africa!” A little more premature.
More than 10,000 well-educated Germans are fleeing abroad from a patron state. Should the red-greens build a wall? Someone who needs 14 years for an airport cannot build a wall.
Ballot boxes in kindergarten. Green MP Emilia Fester (24) is calling for the right to vote for two-year-olds. Some say it should be increased to 25 instead.
EUROPEAN UNION. “Sacks full of money” in the apartment of the Vice President of the European Parliament. If successful, the Swiss EU turbines also beckon lucrative seats in the corruption haven of spending knights.
England. London Bridge is falling apart.
The Duchess of Sussex and her embarrassing prince also fall. Straight from the show on Netflix.
Ukraine. It’s all been said. Even the things you can’t say anymore.
Company. Winnetou complains: pale faces speak with a split brain. The Walking Awake becomes The Walking Dead.
food waste To save the climate, tomato sauce, milk and mashed potatoes are thrown at the paintings. The air conditioner does not respond.
New trends: flying around the world to convince people not to fly.
Climate protests as a springboard for a modeling career.
The word “sin returns”. Previously, the meat ban only applied on Fridays, and soon all year round.
The model of “democratic rule of law” has been discontinued. From left to right, more and more people want to ban what they personally don’t like.
diversity. They are required by everyone, except for the exchange of opinions.
Western feminists are pushing for the right to wear the hijab. Those who protect her burn it.
goodbye Rolling Sixties legends die, but their hits live on: “Be my Baby” (Ronnie Spector), “Great Balls of Fire” (Jerry Lee Lewis).
The science. Researchers have discovered a “furin gap” in the genetic code of the coronavirus. This does not occur in natural coronoviruses. In the lab, on the other hand, yes.
Research deciphers electrical connection between mushrooms. Will mushrooms claim human rights soon?
First successful xenotransplantation of a heart from a genetically modified pig to a human. lucky. Unfortunately, only two months.
UN. It reports eight billion people. Will climate stickers be displayed for family planning soon?
Sports. Tennis god Federer leaves Olympus. Now he is struggling with the earthly shore path in front of his mansion.
FC Basel becomes a gaming agency with its own territory. Basel is only number one in crime statistics.
Qatar. They also played football. Old insight: If fouls are not punished by the rules, they increase. Also refers to the rule of law.
At all. The Western world continues to lose relevance. A new multipolar world order is being formed.
Further loss of trust across all channels.
It used to be a kick in the ass for those who procrastinated. Today this is called “pathological procrastination.” Recently created a self-help group. The annual meeting has been postponed. And Happy New Year!
Claude Cueny (66) is a writer based in Basel. He writes to Blick every second Friday. Most recently, the thriller Dirty Talk was released.