Categories: Opinion

Do garden gnomes have sex?

Even 6,000 years ago, short men were in great demand in the mining industry. Children were also used (and unfortunately still are) because they can still get through the mountain where normal adults get stuck.

In addition to a lantern, a shovel and a pick, the miners’ equipment also included a heavily padded collar cap with a shoulder apron, a kind of protective helmet that protected from dripping water and small falling stones. The visor of the hat was curved with deep rivets, and it was red so that he could see his buddies in the dim light. Since many miners came from the sunny south, they made an exotic impression on the pale natives and soon appeared in fairy tales and sagas in the form of goblin and dwarfs. Basically, they were credited with diligence, positive energy and willingness to help.

Comedians of short stature were very popular at European royal courts. Also at the Medici court in Florence. The draftsman and engraver Jacques Callot (1592-1635) was so carried away by evening performances that he made many caricatures. They quickly spread throughout Europe and inspired painters and sculptors. Callot’s etchings gave rise to the kitschy garden gnome, who today is considered the epitome of the stuffy petty bourgeoisie.

Pamakl prophesied: “I will be born more often.”

In 1958 Belgian comic artist Peio Pierre Culliford (1928-1992) drew blue dwarfs and named them “Les Schtroumpfs”. But it wasn’t until 23 years later that The Smurfs achieved cult status and billions of dollars in merchandising sales thanks to American filmmaking.

In the German-speaking world in the 1960s, the lovable goblin made a splash, “Pumuckl” by master carpenter Eden. He prophesied, “I will be born more often.”

To the dismay of Frank Ulrich, founder of the International Gnome Party (IZP), the little miner has been reincarnated as a horny dwarf who mates with a busty garden gnome. Ulrich saw a threat to German cultural values ​​and demanded a ban from the anti-discrimination authorities because “the garden gnome has no gender. He has no traction. He doesn’t want a woman!”

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Claude Cueny (66) is a writer based in Basel. He writes to Blick every second Friday. His thriller Dirty Talk has just been released.

Claude Kueny
Source: Blick

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