Categories: Health

New Year’s Eve as a single: This helps against the solo blues around the New Year

Julia Dombrowsky / watson.de

The countdown is on and everywhere couples are getting into position: “Ten, nine, eight…” – fireworks light up the sky, stars glitter in the hands, people kissing everywhere mark the beginning of the new year.

For people who would also like to be in a relationship, this moment is often a stab in the heart. A new year that starts lonely. A brave smile between all lovers. Many an involuntary single has already cried in a toilet at the turn of the year.

“The problem is of course not being single per se, but the fact that more people go out as a couple at New Year’s Eve parties than on a normal Saturday evening.”

But why is solo blues so prominent on New Year’s Eve? And how do you prevent the New Year’s party from ending in a sad low point? Watson spoke about this with Vera Matt. She is a relationship therapist and has a psychotherapeutic practice in Brandenburg.

“The problem is of course not necessarily that you are single,” she explains, “but that more people go out as a couple at New Year’s Eve parties than on a normal Saturday evening. If you have a partner, chances are you’ll be spending this evening with them. And so it quickly seems to the single person that everyone, except himself, is in a happy relationship…»

New Year’s Eve is a farewell and a new start in one, symbolically charged and full of expectations. How was the past year for me? And what can I expect in 2024? These are typical questions that arise on New Year’s Eve.

«The calendar jumps to the new year and with it wishes and good intentions become present again. If there is a desire for partnership, at least you will be clearly reminded of it tonight» says Vera Matt. “Just like painful divorces, which you can sometimes look back on.”

As is known, a mild influence of alcohol is not always beneficial for the feelings. The good news, however, is that these blues are easily preventable, says Vera Matt:

«Who says you have to show up at a party with couples and children if you already suspect that you will feel out of place there? New Year’s Eve in particular is the perfect time to have a single night and maybe even find a partner – if you’re looking at all.”

Anyone who regularly experiences New Year’s Eve sadness may first wonder why New Year’s Eve means so much to him or her. «What do I associate with the new year? What wishes are behind this?”, explains Vera Matt. Is it really the desire for a partnership? After children? Or just after a change?

«The limitless also means freedom and adventure. That is flexibility and opportunity.”

«The year has 365 days. There’s no reason to give this one date so much weight in terms of your happiness. Ultimately, New Year’s Eve is a human invention» says Vera Matt.

The single life also has many advantages, the therapist notes: “Of course you can say: ‘I am alone. I have no one.› But the limitless also means freedom and adventure. That is flexibility and opportunity.” If you don’t have to make agreements with a partner, you can do exactly what feels right for you in the new year: Stay on the couch, invite yourself to a fancy hotel or dance the night away – it doesn’t matter.

As simple as it sounds, a lot of sadness can be avoided by choosing the right party. A place where people come together who are also alone is, if in doubt, more fun for singles than the raclette of friends’ couples, says Vera Matt:

«Unlike the family Christmas, New Year’s Eve is actually a great opportunity to enjoy your single status and immerse yourself in life. No one asks when you’ll be home or with whom. Many people in relationships, especially those responsible for children, really miss this freedom.”

And by the next morning at the latest, singles can enjoy the benefits of being untethered as they binge-watch THEIR favorite embarrassing series on the couch all day and quietly slip into January.

It is not one night that will determine what fate will look like in 2024. If you free yourself from overly high expectations, you can – whether you are single or not – enjoy the evening for what it is: a collective party.

source: watson

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