cry for love! We already know who Yara will be dating next summer

Dear ones, please believe me when I say I am old and I know television. For example, on April 12, 2009, a German blonde in the show “Auf und vom” moved up and down, namely to America, where she wanted a) an internship at the gastro chain Hooters and b) admission to Hugh Hefner’s Playboy Mansion and an accompanying career.

She got neither, but I knew right away something really big was coming out of it. Of course I was right. In Germany and in Majorca she is today an influential personality and she married the multi-lifted son of a jungle king who was lifted with his own fat. Her name is Daniela Katzenberger. Well, evidence enough?

Because I have my own theory about our favorite dream bachelorette, Yara. I think yes, sooner or later the guy who won the heart of last year’s Bachelorette will win her heart. Yuri. But first Yara falls in love with Amir, not for nothing she always likes to say: “Amir, come to me!” He will win the relay, second will be James, third probably Filip.

So Amir will win. But already in the afterbirth show, in which everyone has to meet again, they will no longer be together. Because Yara’s worst fears will have come true: Hanoverian influencer Amir was only on the show for fame, not for her. By then, she will also have seen his relationship advice quotes on Instagram, which must be horribly cringe-inducing for any young woman these days.

The most embarrassing moment of falling in love, we learn from Amir, is when you discover that your crush has only gained one new Instagram follower since meeting you, and that’s you. Well, the parameters of love are constantly changing.

This is one of the reasons why Yara leaves him and, with a bleeding heart, retreats to Graubünden to solve her puzzles. There she meets the shy, beautiful Yuri. The two have a lot to tell each other and are both glad that they don’t have to do it in a flashy pub in the crazy society slut hotspot Chur, but in a cozy country pub somewhere in the village.

The sun rises and sets over a Piz and the two look into each other’s pitiful eyes of Graubünden mountain deer and lose themselves in it forever.

But back to episode three of “Bachelorette”. What is there not to tell? Meet a completely uninteresting latecomer and amateur wedding photographer named Sebas! In terms of figure, Gregory also likes «Schtriperinne»! While having fun on the party boat, the giant Arbnor turns out to be a submissive foot fetishist! Which makes Yara uncomfortable. Although Arbnor also finds something else about her “other level”.

He’s not the only one getting excited on the boat.

And James’ lips are definitely part of the climate glue movement.

Good But what are Yara’s lips glued to? For Amir, of course. It coasts. And Amir laments how hard it is to find true love as an influencer. After all, the question is always: is the woman interested in me or in my more than 100,000 followers? A dilemma! Followers are the new money.

Amir is also a great storyteller: of course he is willing to move to little Switzerland for the love of his life. And best of all, his mother is willing to move to Switzerland with him. Yara melts away like a chocolate puzzle in the sun.

But the very old Filip (37!) can also score. He wins the elephant shit challenge. He fills most of the elephant dung in a garette with his bare hands. Ilian, on the other hand, can’t stand it and his Neymar T-shirt, the sensitive road builder is traumatized, he once had to dismantle old pipes.

Filip wants to become a masseur. He has beautiful hands, wants to help people in pain and was married for three years until three years ago. The fact that Yara is so much younger than him doesn’t bother him, of course. Yara wants to become an energy coach and cleanse the aura and chakra fields of people who are energetically blocked.

Together the two were able to build a beautiful company. Professional and private. Especially since Fil has chest hair and likes to ride mopeds, both of which Yara loves.

She doesn’t think Ramon, Salvatore and Gustav are super anymore, although she was especially enthusiastic about the three of them when they got out of the car last week: from Ramon because he gave her a puzzle, from Salvatore because he sang to her, and from Gustav because he ignored her. The enthusiasm of the past is the emotional axis of today, the three are now thrown away like elephant dung.

And so we have seen animal pachyderms and human thin skins and a Yara who is not afraid of anything and always smiling. And precisely because she has neither Daniela Katzenberger’s hair, nor eyebrows, nor fingernails, I’m sure: Yara is the first Bachelorette to moderate SRF “G&G” at one point, that’s how much she is “bi de Lüt”. Something big will come of it. And by the phrase “en guata handle tiara” she can mean three animals, as in the following, or sometimes a royal tiara.