Psychologically explained: This is why we buy gifts at Christmas

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No rush, no crowds, no waste of money: It would be so much easier if we didn’t have to give gifts at Christmas. Yet every year we shop, browse the internet and browse Christmas brochures to find the right gift for our loved ones.

We do this for a good reason: Without gifts, our society would collapse. “Giving is the social glue, so to speak,” says Mischa Gallati, a cultural scientist at the University of Zurich. Because a gift always requires a return gift. This symbolic exchange creates a bond. Gallati also sees this as why most people prefer to give gifts rather than receive them. “So you can decide for yourself who you want to be in a relationship with.”

While today people directly exchange gifts, in the past more time was spent doing this. “You can return gifts even months later,” says Samuel Strehle, a sociologist at the University of Basel. So you weren’t exactly equal and that’s how you formed a relationship. Because guilt also bonds people to each other.

There are different aspects to giving to yourself. You can express your strength as well as joy, compassion, love and connection. Strehle: “If the gift is not reciprocated, you will embarrass the other person.” “If you try to get ahead of yourself with gifts, you may strain the social relationship that gift-giving actually involves,” the sociologist warns.

Even though gifts become larger and more expensive over the years, their monetary value does not ultimately matter. The size of a gift depends more on its meaning for the person in question. Gallati: “For the child, the big Lego knight’s castle is more valuable than the small diamond ring. The situation is probably different for his wife. Gifts can be interpreted in many different ways. This can easily lead to misunderstandings. This makes linguistic accompaniment even more important when giving gifts. Gallati: “If you surrender by remaining silent, there will definitely be a need to talk afterwards.”

The tradition of giving things to each other at Christmas has a different history. Gift-giving is closely linked to St. Nicholas, revered since the Middle Ages. On December 6, she placed gifts in children’s shoes or under their beds. It was only through Martin Luther that the gift date was postponed to Christmas because the cult of the saint was incompatible with the Reformation. “So it’s still not entirely clear who brought the gifts,” says Gallati. “Wish lists go to parents, Santa Claus, or the Jesus child.”

Christmas has also changed a lot over the years. The Christmas tree was introduced only at the end of the 18th century. Typical Chinese fondue only became popular in the 1970s. Religion plays a much smaller role today than it did 50 years ago. By contrast, Christmas is now an almost entirely secular celebration where the family gathers together. Strehle: “The festival is the perfect balance in our fast-paced times.” It encourages us to slow down, pause and renew. Because most stores are closed on holidays. Then it means: no rush, no crowds, no waste of money.

Why we give gifts is one question, why we celebrate Christmas is a second question. Especially at a time when fewer and fewer people believe in God. Atheist websites in German-speaking countries explain why it’s absolutely fine for non-believers to join in the celebrations: They argue that Christmas is not actually a Christian holiday, but rather a pagan one celebrating the winter solstice in December. Therefore, you can attend the festivities safely.

Source : Blick