Who is this woman licking this man and where is my BFF?

Cleo is many things. What Cleo isn’t is Everybody’s Darling. Which it doesn’t have to be. She’s my favorite. I have a thousand universes of love for Cleo. Cleo is one of my two best friends.

And Cleo is bi. Which is logically simple. But I can’t deny that I always struggle with jealousy when she gives away her enormous heart to women.

But right now there is no room for girls in Cleo’s heartland. The reason is October. Of course, the man Cleo is currently in love with isn’t called October.

But anyone who knows Cleo knows that you don’t necessarily have to make an effort to remember the names of her love interests at first. If they are still leading today, they could be history tomorrow.

So at some point I started naming her fights based on the months in which she encountered them. This is where October comes into play.

Cleo picks up October at a party. Illegal of course. So the party. In a cellar that you can only enter if you belong to the distinguished circle that has been informed of an ominous text message. Cleo was there alone. Cleo prefers to party alone.

Anyway, after the party, Cleo is head over heels in love. In October she is sure again: she has found the man of her life. From now on she won’t have time for anything else. Cleo is full of love’s glow. October is also crazy now.

And so I am also in love with the man about whom I know everything and yet nothing. Cleo wants to change that. On a “Pärli evening”. Sandro, who has an ambivalent relationship with Cleo, obviously agrees. All for one, all for love.

We’ll meet at Cleo’s house. There is raclette. Cleo has never cooked for a man before. Not even for a woman. Only for your dog. But that is an other story.

We’ll be there ten minutes before October. Ten minutes in which Cleo changes clothes 38 times.

Then October comes. And Cleo is no longer the Cleo I know. Cleo is stuck in October. Even more. She nibbles on his neck, caresses his hand, sits on his lap. When October has to go to the toilet, there are 56 Cleo kisses as farewell.

While October talks, Cleo caresses his cheek. She nestles her head against his body wherever she can. With every punch line, something dramatic escapes her “Ooooohhhhhhh!”.

I’m so fascinated that I can’t form an opinion about October. Cleo’s behavior also seems rather unpleasant to him. What I understand. And Sandro? At one point he asks Cleo: “You, are you okay?”

“It’s going very well,” she answers. The universe finally sent her this superhero. Cleo wants to know if he isn’t just a whore. Or no, it’s just a rhetorical question.

So I’m sitting there and somehow I feel a little too close to this scent. I also wonder who this woman is and where my best friend is. At some point October disappears. I take Cleo aside and tell her she’s embarrassed. That her behavior is annoying. And that October will remain October forever, because it doesn’t even make it to December.

Cleo thinks I’m exaggerating. Logo. Cleo is completely miserable right now, standing next to the shoes. Floating somewhere.

Sandro and I are much less surprised than Cleo herself that she will soon come down to earth. A few days after the Pärli evening she calls me crying. At 1:22 am Weekdays.

October is over.

I don’t ask.

I put on a jacket, get on my bike and crawl into bed with Cleo.

We will postpone the real conversation until the day this text appears. Hello Cleo, no shit, sweetest BFF ever, we need to chat schampar.

PS I love you.